Social Expectations of sex as you age

Some of the myths that surround sex in your middle age are that you can’t perform, you aren’t attractive, sex is boring, and that it’s undignified. We will look at each of these. But, let’s talk about one of the over-riding themes of this website. Communication. Communication is the most important part of a relationship, including your sex life. There are a lot of posts about communication on the website. If you haven’t read them, I would start here and read about it, then come back to this post.

You Can’t Perform Due to Age

People are healthier now into the later stages of their life than any other time in history. Sex is fun, it feels good, and age does not stop any of this from changing. There are some performance issues that can arise as you get older. Should this be the case and you have a problem with ED, talk to your doctor. Read more about that on this post. As men we need to know and hear that we are more than our penis. Even while you are getting help with your issue, you can still please your partner. Women also have issues as they age, but help is available for your partner’s as well.

Having these problems does have a silver lining. It will force you to communicate about your issues, and work through them together. Remember, if your partner has issues to treat them as relationship issues, not just things for her to fix. It’s how you want your problems to be treated as well.

You are not attractive as you age

Well, we all know this one isn’t true. We all know the saying “Love is Blind”. That is true to some extent, but people are attractive. Your partner is attracted to you, or should be, just as you should be to them. There is a huge list of timeless things that make people attractive. From that sparkle in her eyes to that little giggle that she makes, those things are timeless. There are always things that age will not take the luster off of. Your partner sees in you all those things, your smile, your wit, the way you look at her. All those things are for both of you. Things that you will never lose.

Some people would argue that as you age, your body does change. But that doesn’t mean you are less attractive. There’s plusses to aging, like being softer you make a better pillow. Or that you have years of experience pleasing your partner.

Sex is boring as you age

We should all know this is not true. Sex is what you make it, and if you are reading this site it’s a good sign that you want the best sex ever. At this point in your life, you should have experiences that make you nothing but better in bed. If not, that’s OK, you can still learn! Communication with your partner is where this becomes paramount. We should all realize by now that the best sex is the best sex we can have with our partners. Sex is only boring if you make it boring. And, what others call boring might not be for you. I know that most my friends are not nearly as adventurous as my SO and I.

Sex is undignified

No one should be made feel bad about their sexuality. People thinking that sex is undignified are just being silly. Yea, it’s messy, it’s fun! But there’s nothing undignified about having good sex with your partner. Hell, it’s undignified to not at least try to have good sex! I know when older people talk about being sexual, the typical reaction is to think “ew”. But, that’s not the right reaction. We should, as a society, be HAPPY for anyone that’s got a healthy sex life. It’s normal and a good thing for people to have sex. Sex has a myriad of health benefits for people of every age. Both mental and physical benefits.

Sex is awesome at every age

Sex shouldn’t be something that carries a stigma at any age. In your 40s, 50s and beyond, sex should be something fun. If you’d like to discuss this or any other post on the site, hit us up on the contact us page, or comment below!

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