Anatomy

There’s a whole post about female that I hope you’ve read already.  Women are much more than just their pussy, we all know this.  We need to understand the anatomy of what we are doing before we get into the event itself.  Understanding where things are will help you please your partner.  Knowing why she feels the things she does will help you make her feel amazing.  So, learn the anatomy.  Learn where the clitorus is and where it goes inside her body.

Paying Attention to Her Responses

You have to pay attention to her responses to your inputs.  Make sure that you’ve communicated before sex about what you like and don’t like.  Then pay attention.  You have to understand it takes build up.  Turn her brain on then you can play with her body.  She will respond to your touches and you should know her reactions, good or bad.  Also remember evokes a negative response in the beginning might evoke a much different reaction once the action heats up.

Heating Things Up

Just like you, your partner doesn’t have a “switch” to be turned on, it’s a process.  She needs to be warmed up.  So when you start, be gently.  Kiss and caress all over.  Tell her how beautiful she is.  touch her chest (not just her breasts).  There are other posts about warming up and how to “get her started”, but it’s important to remember.

Once she’s going a little, kiss her pussy.  Right on the lips.  Lick from bottom to top, paying attention GENTLY to the tip of the clitoris.  Use your lips, not your tongue (except to keep your lips wet).  Rub her lips with yours.  Then start using your tongue both in and on her pussy and tip of her clitoris.  Once you are really going, add your fingers and help her climax!

Using Your Lips

As stated above, using your lips is good in the beginning.  It’s important to know that in general, most women do not want a lot of direct simulation on the tip of their clitoris in the beginning.  It is too much.  So, be gently, using your lips on her lips.  Then, as she gets more turned on you can be more aggressive.  Your lips should be slick and slide around, but you can also suck on her lips some, kiss all over.  Build her up then pull back, kiss her inner thighs, take a minute to appreciate the view from time to time.  Then dive back in to the job at hand!

Your lips should be used the whole time (along with your tongue).  Sucking on her lips and the tip of her clit will feel good to her.  You can build up the aggressiveness as she gets more turned on.  Just pay attention to how she’s reacting to your inputs.  She should be making it clear if it’s not working for her.

Adding Your Fingers

Anatomy rears its head again.  Knowing your partner’s anatomy is important, as is knowing what she likes and dislikes.  Some general things to remember are start gentle, let her lead the aggressiveness that you play with her with.  Play with the outside of her labia with enough pressure that you are gently moving her clitorus (using your fingers to squeeze her outer labia and move them up and down making sure everything is lubricated where you are touching).  Practice playing with her pussy, enjoy the time and pay attention.  Be intentional with your actions here.

Penetrate gently with the intention to augment your oral work, not to bring her to climax.  Know where to press for maximum effect but remember to pull back.

Time for the Lips and Tongue

Lick her pussy.  Savor the taste, the texture.  The way her skin feels smooth and inviting.  Feel her body respond to finally feeling your tongue on her skin.  Kiss her labia and the outer-labia skin.  Work your way toward her vaginal opening and her clit.  Be gentle.  Tease her.  Flatten your tongue and lick her slowly from the bottom of her vaginal opening to her clit, letting each part of your tongue touch her clit.

The licking continues, but add sucking on her labia and clitorus (gentle, let her guide you!).  Focus more and more on her clit.  Use your fingers at her guidance, some women like internal and external stimulation, some only like it for part of the ride.

The Orgasm

Now it’s time to focus.  Really work her clit.  Use your tongue, suck with her guidance (and remember her guidance for next time).  From what I’ve read and in my experience, most women are 11:00 or 1:00 women.  That means they have a preferred “side” of the clitorus to stimulate at your 11 or 1 o’clock.  But don’t focus only there, work around it, suck on it, lick it all over with varying and increasing pressure.

Sucking on her clit as though it’s a tiny penis head as you eat her pussy also feels amazing.  Feeling her clit expand under the negative pressure in your mouth s you eat her pussy feels so good.  The slickness of the skin, the taste of all her juices as she gets more excited is intoxicating.  Her body should be responding all over now, hands grabbing or opening and closing.  Her back arching off the bed.  She might even be moving her pussy around as your mouth “chases” it.

As the orgasm hits her, it’s similar to when you are getting a blowjob and your head gets too sensitive to continue, that’s what it feels like to her if you continue stimulating.  So lay off when she makes it clear that it’s too much.

Decision Time

Some women like to ride this orgasm wave.  Do not touch her clit or her pussy until it’s clear to you that it’s OK.  It might be 90 seconds, it’ might be 30 minutes.  She might want a gentle fuck, she might want you to immediately fuck her like you own her as she’s cumming.

Now that you’ve given her the orgasm she so richly deserves, she’s going to have a tough time talking.  You should know your relationship well enough to know your partner’s body language.  Using this, you should know when to move on to fucking her.  But that’s not part of this post….

Conclusion

Now that you have some guidelines on how to eat her pussy until she can’t talk, using this to bring her to some of the best orgasms she’s ever had should be a little, or a lot, easier.  As always, if you have a comment or question, please let me know using the contact page link above!  For some further reading, the article on Thought Catalog is something that I agree with.

Caveats and a Word of Warning

There is one thing to make sure you do.  If your partner says “like that” as you eat her pussy, you are going to feel the urge to speed up, apply more pressure, change something.  Please, do not do this.  Just don’t.  Your partner is communicating that she’s close and loves what’s happening.  Changing it resets her orgasm meter.

This is not intended to be the last article written about this for this site.  The plan is to write a few articles that work on different part of the act.  This advice is not intended to be universal and not all women can or will be satisfied by the techniques described below.

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If you haven’t yet read the post on the clitoris or the post about female external anatomy, you probably should. I will be referring back to those as I explain what you are doing and most importantly WHY you are doing it. As with every sex act and partner, communication is key to happiness. We need to communicate with our ladies, and encourage them to communicate with us as well! This is only more so when we talk about eating her pussy. If you’d like to watch an instructional video about it, Nina Hartley has a good one you can google.

Getting Started

Assuming you’ve read the posts that I will be referring back to, and that you’ve communicated to your woman what you want to and intend to do, let’s get started! Always start by understanding that her entire body is a sex organ. So, touch, kiss, caress everywhere. I try to never take my hand/fingers off of her body no matter what I’m doing. Kissing her, building up tension and need is the goal. If you have a toy (we have a Hitachi and a speed controller, it’s awesome) then place it on her clit and leave it set to low.

Start at her face. Kiss her like you mean it. Let your fingers and hands wander all over her body as you kiss her. Play with her breasts, move your kissing down to her neck. Make your way down her body to her pussy. Once you are there, move the toy (assuming you have one there) and start gently kissing her outer labia. Her clitoral hood should be kissed as well. Gently insert your tongue in between her inner labia and tease her a little, but never stop kissing and licking.

Going Downtown

Start gently. Eating her pussy is not a speed sport. The best orgasms come from a slow build. When you really start to focus on the clit, you need to have your hands in a place where you can gauge her reactions to what you are doing. If you hold her hands, she’ll squeeze them when she’s feeling a lot of something (sometimes good, sometimes bad). There will be a time when she’s really pushing and lifting her pussy off the bed as you eat away. When she’s moving, she might be moving to refocus your tongue on a more pleasurable part of her clit. Some prefer to focus on the top, on the button itself, or just below, let her direct you.

Try different things to her and let her guide you as to what works and what doesn’t. Draw the alphabet on her clit with your tongue and pay attention to which letters she reacts to. Suck gently then more firmly depending on her reaction to your efforts. Lick and stimulate inside her pussy, fucking her with your tongue and see how she reacts. Like her taint and her ass if you are feeling up for it (there will be an analingus post coming sometime…). Just try things, see what feels best for her.

When her orgasm starts to build, you have a decision to make. Do you want her to cum yet? It’s yours to control. Do you want to enjoy the view, the taste, the experience some more. If so, slow down, change focus, lick inside her pussy for a few seconds. You want her to cool down a little, to back away from the precipice. The goal here is to make the orgasm as big as you can, and this type of building will be a good way to do that. Eating her pussy to orgasm is spiritual for me. I love doing it, and it shows.

The Big Finish

When you want her to cum and you know she’s getting close, she might say things to you like “I’m close” or “Just like that”. With statements like that, the instinct you are going to have fight is to speed up or press harder. Don’t change anything. If you are using your tongue on her clit with suction, keep doing exactly that. If you have a finger in her pussy as you rhythmically lick her clit, don’t speed up, don’t slow down, don’t change ANYTHING. Let her have her orgasm, and don’t stop until she’s done. I’ve found that internal stimulation can continue, but usually after the orgasm hits her, the clitoral stimulation has to stop. Just like her sucking your dick, her clit gets very sensitive after an orgasm. I would strongly suggest starting to fuck her immediately after she’s told you “no more” on her clit.

The goal is to leave her a blubbering mess. Unable to move or to speak. Having an orgasm like this will make her putty in your hands. A lot of people say that doesn’t happen or can’t, but with good communication and some practice (darn it!) it can happen.

As always, if you have questions, check out our Contact Page and shoot us a message. We’d love to hear from you!

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